Yesterday was Sunday, and I was very happy for the opportunity to remain in bed as long as my suffering body determined was necessary. At twelve thirty I was finally able to arise, so glad not to have to be anywhere else, so grateful for the opportunity to be able to rest.
Several hours later, I felt well enough to cook dinner, and it was with great joy that I picked up a beautiful cake pan which had been purchased many months before but had never been used. That cake pan has love written all over it! The mold is so beautiful; it makes four good sized individual cakes and the shapes are just beautiful. Four different delightful cakes waited for so long to be baked for my family.
Chocolate banana bread batter filled the four cake molds, and went in the oven. The roast, potatoes, and carrots were prepared. My son and I stepped out back to our small herb garden and harvested fresh rosemary, and some of the potatoes and carrots from the roast were fried up in a pan along with some Blessed Salt and olive oil. Crescent rolls, butter, and two kinds of grapes were added to the table.
The atmosphere was one of tremendous gratitude for such a feast, and for the strength to be able to prepare it. After lighting the candles (which had previously burned before the Blessed Sacrament), blessing the food and one another, everyone else's food in the neighborhood, and everyone else, too, we enjoyed the delicious food and the company of one another. It was a wonderful meal! Typically on Sunday nights, we attend the 8:30 p.m. Holy Mass.
Just after having eaten, the gift of stamina was taken away, and the gift of suffering once again took its place. My children cleaned up the kitchen and I went to lay down on the couch in the front room. Before proceeding upstairs to her bedroom, my thirteen year old daughter Alyssa compassionately covered me with a blanket and saw to it that I was comfortable.
Just before I passed out, the Lord came to me and said that He knew I would only have enough stamina to either cook dinner or attend Holy Mass. Realizing that I would choose going to Holy Mass, He wanted to please me and so He allowed me to cook, knowing full well that I would not be well enough afterwards to be with Him, and receive Him, during the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass.
What tremendous love, what kindness, what great compassion our Savior has for us! He knew how much I longed to cook dinner for my children.
I asked our sweet and gentle Jesus to please bring me Holy Communion just before falling into a very peaceful, unusual sleep for several hours.
The reason this story is being repeated is to remind you that our most loving Savior Jesus Christ cares about you very much. He knows your concerns, your hardships, your struggles, and the desires of your heart. None of your suffering goes unnoticed, and He takes your suffering quite personally. In fact, your suffering is a tremendous gift, and an opportunity for you to grow in closer union with our Lord.While Jesus always loves us, and is always with us, He wants us to make the effort, out of love and not because we want something, to come to Him, too. He wants us to crave this intimate union with Him, to long to be with Him, to spend time with Him.
Examine your life, your motives, and your schedule. Determine if Jesus has been granted His proper place, first place. Approach Him, spend time with Him, tell Him you love Him, ask Him what you can do for Him. Don't just go to Him when you want something, and don't limit His loving influence in your life! There is so much He wants to accomplish in you, and through you.
"Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and you shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you..." (Matthew 7:7).
God is so in love with you!!
